Seriously though. Harry/Joan. I ship it now.
So I’m currently working on a fanart of John, Joan, and Elementary!Holmes going out for the night (I’m not sure what it’s called when you go to bars with the intention of picking up a lady to have a one night stand with, but they’re doing whatever that verb is), and it’s a few months after Sherlock!Holmes went and Reichenbach’d himself, so my set up for the fanart is that John needed to get away to the point of having to leave England so he made an impromptu decision to go to New York, got totally smashed on the plane, bumped into Joan and inebriatedly hit on her as he was making his way out of the airport (Joan and Elementary!Holmes having finished scoping something out there for a case) and Joan, being the awesome sober companion she is and finding out that John has nowhere to go and just in general being a wonderful human being (yay impropmtu trips! \o/), invites her back to her place (“Not that way, I’m all about the ladies.” “Damn, I should’ve been my sister then.”).
John gets on *surprising well* (to Joan, at least) with Elementary!Holmes after the initial “WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE SHERLOCK HOLMES?” reaction, and after he takes a nap to sleep off some of the emotional upheaval and drunkenness, they all go out to a bar because Holmes has decided that sexytimes are what John needs, yes (“No, Joan, this is not just an excuse to pick up chicks, God, woman, what do you take me for?” “A truly terrible wingman, that’s what. John, you should hear about what happened a couple weeks ago when I was chatting up this gorgeous bicurious girl…” “Dear Lord, you are a terrible wingman. You should be banned.”).
And then the next day MORE OF THE AIRPORT CASE, and John tells about doing something similar (“hey, an extra gun is an extra gun and less work for Mary, just don’t get yourself deported, man” “Mary?” “Her [insert gun type here because I don’t know anything about guns :(]”), and Joan does ALL of the tactical planning and John’s so impressed and tells her that damn, she sounds like some of the best commanders he’s ever worked under, the US Military’s loss, y’know? and by the end of the week (which is when John had bought the return ticket for) they PWN THE CASE and have had some very successful bar going and lady-pick-uping, and John’s had fun for the first time in months and his leg isn’t hurting him and it’s all brilliant, but now it’s time to go.
So he tells them to stop by any time they’re in London (“221b Baker Street, if you can remember. If not, you’ve got my email address.” “I’ll remember.” “Yeah, he’ll remember.”) and he goes home to his life of misery and the Elementary!two go back to their lives of badassery and bestfriendship.
And then a few months later, a case does indeed bring Holmes and Joan out to England, among other places, and they contact John and agree to stay with him because yay reciprocation of favors and free lodging. But then Harry has a breakdown during their stay and has to come to her brother (who’s more tolerant of her spiraling alcoholism now that he’s unable to deal with his spiraling depression), and HARRY MEETS JOAN and all is lovebirds and and and <3 and Holmes gets so jealous because my sober companion, what is this emotional attachment to your lover, Joan, this is not how we do things. And Joan tells him to Deal With It, because he’s being an asshole, and he and John go out to a bar and he rants about Joan and it reminds John of Sherlock’s rants about John so they’re just a mess, but Harry quits her temp job (because you will never convince me that Harry Watson is not Catherine Tate) and goes and lives with Joan and Holmes and finally understands John’s relationship with Sherlock, and Holmes gets used to Joan having a girlfriend, and John’s happy that Harry’s got someone who can actually help her deal with her alcoholism and also motivates her to do so even though he’s all miserable and alone again.
